Rancho La Valentina

 

By Gawd, Precious and the cowboys of Rancho La Valentina.

Acknowledgement

Lil Guts, Precious, By Gawd, Doc

Get 10 free recipes just by dropping by my web site at www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com. Lordy!

A review from Irene, Austin, TX:

"Finally a cookbook and stories I can relate to. I grew up on a ranch (also in Texas) and all your stories bring back those memories (which I love) of being brought up “Country”. I like that your recipes are not too complicated and not too much prep work needed. I work a lot of hours and do not have too much free time during the week to cook but this past weekend I tried your recipe for the “By Gawd” roast. I ended up having to use a spoon to serve because it was falling apart. “Oh my Lord” is what I kept saying as my mouth was watering. I will normally only eat leftovers once after but not this time. I had roast for three days and it was still the friggin’ bomb.
"Thank you David, I am looking forward to making more of your recipes and good luck on your book sales, it was well worth the $$ I spent. Good re-deen’! is what we call it in TEXAS."

Thanks, Irene! Good eatin' and keep it fun!

I finally was convinced to publish this cookbook I first started more of a joke than anything else and just kept at it since 1987. This cookbook is filled with over 115 easy to learn recipes that I have gathered over the many years of ranchin', ropin', and travelin'. I wrote the cookbook after my first marriage broke up and it is written for all men that need to know how to cook to impress that next lady or for every college bound student that has been thrown out to make it on his or her own. Every meal is included here from breakfast to supper, (dinner to some), and the pizza and chili recipes are downright the best you will ever encounter. At the end of this blog I've included one of my favorite recipes and it will knock your socks off!

You can find the download version of the cookbook at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/.

Excerpts from "A Broke Cowboy's Cookbook."

I want to acknowledge all the good people from whose recipes I plagiarized, borrowed, changed, stole, or otherwise unscrupulously obtained. Not limited to, but certainly to include, all the good and bad one-toe-off-one-boot, heel-off-the-other and one-spurred cowboys, living and dead, their wives, ex-wives, girlfriends, mistresses and other ner'do wells, has-beens, will-bes and wants-to-bes that I am notoriously known to be associated with. Without your help I would probably still be married and would not have had to learn to cook, clean, wash, and iron.

Thanks alot, fellers!

David W. (By Gawd) Andrews’ Jalapeño Meat Loaf

What can I say? I wouldn’t cook this around ma or gra’ma. It would make ‘em mad as hell. If you don’t like the flavor of the jalapeños on the first try, do it one more time without the jalapeños and then tell me if this isn’t the best you’ve had. Yeah, yeah, you know by now that it was the beer again. So what?

1 lb. ground meat, (sirloin is the best)
1 lb. ground pork
2 eggs
4 slices of white or whole wheat bread crumpled up, about 2 cups, (some have used Rye Bread)
¼ cup chopped fresh Parsley
2 tsp. Basil leaf
1 ½ tsp. salt
¼ tsp. pepper, use McCormick’s Coarse Ground or freshly ground
1 large size jalapeño pepper finely chopped, not seeded
David W. (By Gawd) Andrews’ Tangy Tomato Sauce – see Sauces

Mix all ingredients and fold into a 9” X 5” X 3” lightly oiled loaf pan. Invert loaf pan on a cookie sheet pan that has been well oiled or sprayed with something like Pam and leave the loaf pan on top of the mixture on top of the cookie sheet. Place in a pre-heated oven at 350° for 2 hours. Remove from loaf pan and cookie pan, spread David W. (By Gawd) Andrews’ Tangy Tomato Sauce over the top and serve leftover sauce on the side.

David W. (By Gawd) Andrews' Tangy Tomato Sauce

16 oz. tomato sauce
2 tbls. chopped parsley
1 tbls. Worcestershire sauce
2 dashes of Tabasco sauce

Mix all ingredients in a sauce pan. Bring to just under boil, stirring frequently. Remove from heat and serve. Use this on your meat loaf and you’ll never buy ready-made again. This is great.

You can find out more about David W. By Gawd Andrews and find the download version of his cookbook at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and you can find Rancho "La Valentina" at http://www.rancholavalentina.com/.

Precious

Precious and By Gawd
A great Michelada recipe at the end of this.

Experpts from "A Broke Cowboy's Cookbook."

Now having thought I had learned my lesson ‘bout women I was perfectly happy living in Mérida, Yucatán, México, single, riding my Harley, scuba diving, watching the ‘Boys on Sunday afternoons laying out by my pool drinking beer.

Welp, fate shows up and I run into this absolutely beautiful, knock down gorgeous woman in the jungle in the State of Campeche, México, both of us there on business, and fell head over heels in love at first sight meaning I hadn’t learned anything after all. This beautiful lady’s name is Mayté, “Precious”, Aguilar.

I chased this woman all over the Yucatán Peninsula for six months before she would agree to even have a drink with me. First, howsoever, I had to agree to some “interviews”. Interviews? Well, OK, I’m an ex-bull rider with several one-point landings on my head, I’m game. First interview was with her bodyguard, a real Neanderthal with calluses on his knuckles. See, his hands dragged the ground when he walked, sorta like an ape. We got wasted one afternoon on beer during the interview and after that he and I were big buddies proving I can talk my way into just about anything. My problem has always been once I’ve talked my way into something is talking my way back out of it.

After that came eight more interviews, her godmother and several other people very close and protective of her. The last ones were her two brothers, then her mother and father.

Nine interviews.

Nine.

Now we get to have that drink.

Welp, after several dates and me slobbering all over myself each time we would meet in very public places, we finally hooked up, boyfriend/girlfriend, (parejas in Spanish), then the church and then we started a ranch down in the Yucatán Peninsula together.

“By Gawd’s” Dirty Michelada

Most of you rascals have snuck off to Mexico at one time in your life and were introduced to the Michelada. I sometimes use this as my “Bloody Mary” when I have imitated John Travolta the night before. Really pretty simple and in spite of all the yuppie legends you do not have to have Mexican beer. What I think is your own favorite beer is what you really want to taste. For me it’s Coors Light.

4 drops of Tabasco Sauce
1/4 tsp Worcestershire Sauce
Dashes of Salt and Ground Pepper
1 jigger of lime juice
1 lime wedge
1 can of your favorite beer

First you want to put some salt on a saucer, rub a lime wedge around the glass you are going to drink it in, then rub the rim of the glass in the salt until you have the whole rim coated pretty good with salt. Next, drop in about 4 cubes of ice. Pour in the limejuice on top of the ice, then the Tabasco Sauce then the Worcestershire Sauce, salt and pepper. Now the beer and drop in the used lime wedge.

You can find more drink recipes plus over a 115 other great recipes from breakfast through supper and the download version of the book plus more about David W. By Gawd Andrews at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and Rancho "La Valentina" at http://www.rancholavalentina.com/ .

Why By Gawd?

You can learn how to cook this puppy by going to the download version plus over 115 other great recipes at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and looking in Meats for "Lil Guts" Andrews Cheatin' Brisket.

Excepts from "A Broke Cowboy's Cookbook."

I don’t really know why people keep asking me how I got the name of “By Gawd”. I mean, I never asked “Swivel Hips” how she got her name, I never asked “Tiny Hiney” how she got her name. (That one was obvious, Pilgrim.) Certainly I never asked “Boobs” how she got her name. (Again, obvious plus a very large big brother.)

But nonetheless there are those out there that just have to know.

When I was just a little squirt my family was a large ranch family in Northeast Texas. By all accounts pretty big. Small county, small town. When I would go into town to watch the serials at the local movie house, you know things like Buck Rogers, Roy Rogers, and so on, the old timers would see me coming and say, “Well here comes Lil’ Charlie”. Charlie being my daddy’s name. I would look them right in the eye, square back my five year old shoulders and tell them, “Nope, I’m David, by gawd.” Yep, after a couple of years of this they would say, “Well here comes ole By Gawd!” And that’s how it got started.

I grew up like a lot of the kids in the fifties, sixties, (and I do remember the sixties), working on a ranch cowboying, learning all the good and bad things from the old time cowboys.

Like most boys in those days I thought a “Red Rider BB Gun” was stud, had one, and also like most boys during that time got whupped for shooting my big sister in the butt and shooting the sheets when they were hanging on the clothes line to dry. Man, that made the neatest sound of WHOOP! when that BB would hit a wet sheet! So did my mother’s belt hitting my butt when she saw the rust stain from the BB on her clean white sheets.

Started roping calves when I was around ten or so, spent time with the great Fagan family down in Tivoli, Texas cowboying for roping lessons and room and board. My horse, Buck and me. Got pretty good, too. Course, Freddy Fagan and his brother–in-law, Amy Gamblin, (1954 RCA, later PRCA, Calf Roping Champion), could chunk a loop. From that I got hooked on a great sport that would pretty much control a large part of my life as I was growing up.

‘Course as I write this I am now 60 years old and still trying to grow up but that’s another story when we have more time.

Check out the blogs below and see a couple of great recipes.

You can learn more about David W. By Gawd Andrews by going to the download version of the book plus more than 115 great tasting recipes at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and to see the ranch in the Yucatán, México at http://www.rancholavalentina.com/

By Gawd And The Rodeoing

Precious and By Gawd

From the download version at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com

My dad went pro in cutting horses and naturally I tagged along when I was about 13. Then I got really stupid and started ridding bulls when I was in High School. Not built for bulls, (I’m tall and lean and bull riders are generally short and built like tanks), I went for the bulls ‘cause the girls thought that was cool. Bull riders the girls thought were cool. The ones that could stay on. Which does not necessarily mean me. But being young and dumb I did it anyway.

Then along comes Viet Nam and, well, I volunteered with a couple of other good ole Texas boys that just wanted to fight. Cowboys all.

Well, that got me finally to California with one of the fellers I enlisted with. He was a bareback rider and me bulls. With our military ID’s we were eligible to ride PRCA and, brother, we did. Every weekend for one year. Up and down the West Coast USA. All the time in the military.

Now you have to understand something here. You see the company commanders, squadron commanders had all kinds of great athletes that couldn’t stay in college for whatever reason and were getting drafted. So, up springs this culture of semi-pro football, baseball, golf and so on and these boys didn’t work, train, nada, just play, practice and so on. When I went to my First Shirt and told him I was a bull rider, I was blessed, water was sprinkled on my head and I was asked what can we do for you. I was the only cat on base that was a rodeo cowboy and therefore you can imagine the bragging rights I was going to give to my commanding officer. Whoa, boy! All of a sudden I was somebody and cold sober!

Bottom line was I got a 24/7 travel pass, a letter authorizing me to have medical treatment at any hospital and I only had to work on Tuesdays, Wednesday and Thursdays. Fridays through Mondays were traveling and rodeo days, hitchhiking in those days. Just bring back the pictures they took of me coming out of the chute so the commanding officer could show them off at the Officer’s Club and brag. Most pictures of me had to be taken very early after I called for my gate or they would just get a picture of my boots going north up in the air and my head heading south to the ground. Those clowns would come over to me and asked me if I was alright while I was trying to stand up and get my ears on the right side of my hat and I would always say something really intelligent like, “Momma, is that you?”

Learn more about By Gawd, read his hilarious stories on his recipes and get some great cookin' done! By Gawd teaches you how to cook from boiling water to roast beef to chicken fried steak with cream gravy! Makes those other fellers saying, "Let's go to Chez le McDonald's" sound a little weak. Visit By Gawd, Precious, Lil Guts and Doc for the download version, over 115 great tasting recipes, at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and check out where all the cooking goes on at http://www.rancholavalentina.com/ .

By Gawd and the Hell's Angels

Chow line at Rancho "La Valentina"

Now getting on a bull to me wasn’t a scary experience, much. I had all the respect in the world for the animal, knew how he was going to go and did my best to stay with him then get away from him if I could see after landing on my head and my hat was covering my eyes and my ears.

Now a scary experience was hitchhiking going through Bakersfield, California and getting picked up by Hell’s Angels. ‘Bout fifteen of ‘em and being so impressed that I was a bull rider they had to show me to the “Prez”.

Off the highway we go with an escort of all these Harley’s to the house of the “Prez” really tucked away from the world where there were more of ‘em.

Now, me being 19 years old, surrounded by something like 20 Hell’s Angels in 1967, that’s a scary deal. I didn’t ruin my britches or anything but my knees were a knocking so loud if it weren’t for those Harley’s rumbling in the background everyone would have thought we were under fire from the police they were hitting each other so hard! Well, after ten or twelve beers my knees quit beating each other to death, the “boys” were impressed with me and took me about a 100 miles on up the road toward Clovis, California where the rodeo was I trying to get to that weekend.

Give me 1,800 pounds of Christen Brothers bull any day over that deal.

I managed to survive these experiences, went to Southeast Asia, serving my God, my country and honoring my family, came home, married my high school sweetheart, had babies, went to college on the GI Bill, worked as a bouncer in a bar, a mechanic in a factory and so on. The American Dream. I lived it to the fullest and loved every minute of it and still do.

Want to set up a meal like this? You can! "A Broke Cowboy's Cookbook" is for those of you that have never cooked before. In his book, By Gawd teaches you to cook great tastin' and great lookin' meals from scratch. Learn more about it and buy the download version of the book, over 115 great tasting and easy recipes, at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and see Rancho "La Valentina" at http://www.rancholavalentina.com/ .

By Gawd and Can Do Trotter

By Gawd's Shrimp/Seafood Cocktail Sauce at the end of this.

Now when this child was born, By Gawd's first grandbaby, they tried to tell him he couldn't go in and hold her. I reckon he did. Cowboy up!

Now I have had Lil Guts and Doc plus my friends over the last twenty odd years trying to get me to publish this crazy cookbook I started in 1987. I have messed around with this thing until I met Can Do. He was the one that finally convinced me to do something with it besides it being a hobby. He felt it was that good. Now Can Do is a cat in the hat. Get 'er done, Can Do!

Since 1987 when this thing got started I have given away so many copies, added to it from various experiences I have had finding recipes on several ranches as a ranch broker, scouting for hunters, traveling around and so on. I just let it lay around and didn’t do anything with it. Well, not quite true. I did try to publish it right after I wrote it but I kept running into these lady editors that didn’t like the “tone”, so to speak.

So I’m still getting recipes and continuing to up-date this puppy as time goes on. And I was fat, dumb and happy with that.

Then I run into this cat from Los Angeles, California down in Xalapa, Veracruz, Mexico.

Where?

In Xalapa, Veracruz, Mexico. And neither one of us were running from the law.

Name is Kelly, “Can Do” Trotter. Cool guy and would have made a great cowboy had he had the opportunity. Cowboys are the most hard headed/can fix it/do it/will figure it out cats in the world and that fits his personality.

Anyway, back to my story, “Can Do” and I were consuming some good old Mexican beer in the hotel bar one night and I mentioned I had written this cook book of really good, really easy cooking for some boys that were single, divorced, whatever but not of the kitchen persuasion, cooking challenged and he wanted to talk to me about marketing this thing on the internet.

Well, here we are.

There are some complicated recipes in there but 95% of what you will find are really simple and they are good. Plus, I am telling you what to steal when you are hitting the door with a really mad soon-to-be-ex-wife on your back, whatever, or what to buy if you are off on your own for the first time away from momma and you have to learn how to eat something besides fast food.

Not to mention how to get a date. “Darlin’, come over to my place and let me fix you some chicken fried steak, cream gravy, mashed potatoes and home made biscuits.”

Get back, Cat! You gonna get run plum over! You gonna make that dude saying, “Let’s go to ‘Chez le McDonalds’“ look pretty weak.

I have included several things in here besides just recipes. Things like what you need to have to get started cooking, some measurements you really need to keep handy and some suggested cooking times.

I’ll be up-dating this thing as time goes on, will keep growing the book but will continue to keep the cooking challenged in mind. Just remember to try it my way first then you can mess around with it and see if you can get it to your particular taste. However, always try to keep it fun and enjoy yourself.

So, here we are. I suggest you pop a top, kick back and start readin’ this and start dreaming of the good times coming. There are honestly some great recipes I have somehow managed to get my hands on over the last 50 odd years and I have cooked everyone of them or they would not be here.

David W. (By Gawd) Andrews’ Shrimp/Seafood Cocktail Sauce

I fixed this one Sunday afternoon in my Xalapa house for Precious, her brother, his family, and one of our best friends from Puebla, Puebla, Mexico and they said it was a knock down good! Precious' brother asked me why I didn't bottle it.

The Shadow and ole By Gawd were doing Bourbon Street in New Orleans one night, fell into a seafood joint that had no sauce but all the fixin’s on the table. Do your own kinda deal. Welp, being a ole time cowboy I figured that one out pretty quick. They had Tabasco Sauce, Horseradish, Worcestershire Sauce and catsup on the tables. I jumped right in there like I thought I knew what I was doing to keep the Shadow impressed. Tasted it, surprised myself and then the Shadow tasted it. She sat there still as a tree for about 30 seconds. Then she snapped out of it and told me she must have fainted. I asked her if it was too hot and she just jumped into that sauce like she was going to swim in it! Fixed it one day at my house in Xalapa, Veracruz, Mexico when “Can Do” Trotter and I were working and “Can Do”, who doesn’t like Horseradish, really liked it. We ate some shrimp that day, Bubba.

1/3 cup catsup
2 tsp. of Tabasco Sauce
2 tsp. Prepared Horseradish
1 tsp. Worcestershire Sauce

Mix and stir it up really well. Put in refrigerador for a couple of hours before you serve it. Cat, I don’t know how to tell you this but it is better than what you can buy!

Learn more about By Gawd, Precious, Lil Guts and Doc, buy the download version of the book, over 115 great tasting and easy recipes from breatkfast to supper and see the ranch at http://www.abrokecowboyscookbook.com/ and http://www.rancholavalentina.com/.